An Open Letter To Google: Stop Pimping Tramp – Stamped Images

Dear Google,

It’s me, your good buddy Bob. I’m just writing to you to ask if you would be so kind as to STOP CLUTTERING MY IMAGE SEARCHES WITH SHUTTERSTOCK TRASH!

Seriously; it’s not bloody 1984. I’m sick of trying to find an image of something I need and having my Google search turn up sixteen billion images, all featuring a crap Shutterstock watermark. I get the fact that copyright is important and such, but if I want to use a picture of a moose wearing shoes in my PowerPoint, I should be able to do so without fearing the presence of a bit of grey, incohesive vandalism over the top.

The worst part, Google, is that I sometimes fail to even see the bloody Shutterstock tramp-stamp. As a man who wears glasses (albeit for seeing into the distance) my vision is sometimes temperamental. I find my image; I copy it over to photoshop where I plan on warping it beyond ¬†measure; I edit down to the finest detail; I export it…then I see the stamp and realise that I have wasted half an hour of my life on Shutterstock’s filthy whore of an image.

I’m not against the company having a catalogue of images that may be of interest to the creative demographic of the Internet, but it pains me that their images are the ones that dominate image searches…which leads me to you, Google. Or should I use your pimp name…El Googello?!

Seriously, Google, you guys have a decent set of skills; you’re mobile phone giants, you’re building a self-driving car and you’re pretty much the only company keeping Apple from becoming Skynet. So why the hell can you not keep my image searches free of Shutterstock’s whored out images? Failing that, can you not build in an option to use a none watermarked one?

All I’m saying is that you good little Google goblins have a responsibility to ensure that our internet is free of such a dominant online presence, or before you know it, at this rate, it’ll be the same with every other corner of the Internet. Skrillex will be the only remixing artist music streaming services suggest; Huffington post will be the only online news outlet offering our click bait; Brazzers will be stamped on everything that shows any parts of a naked human form. Nobody needs that kind of a monotonous online experience…variety is the spice of life Google. Shake it up a bit.

Yours, now and forever (or until tax evasion destroys you)

Bob

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